The Power of Self-Awareness

Tips from Dr. Liz

Self-Awareness is a Powerful Thing

It allows us to start to see things through a different lens… and it helps us to identify ways in which we can heal, grow, and show up better for ourselves and our loved ones.

HOWEVER… the concern for many people is that they end up getting stuck in this awareness phase, which unfortunately does not actually lead to change, but rather just to more awareness. 

A lot of people get really excited, and even relieved, as they discover new information that helps them start to make sense of their pain, trauma, and relationship difficulties…

It is this incredible “ah ha” moment of feeling like the dots are finally connecting and feeling validated and normalized in their experiences.

To be clear, this really is amazing! Finally, not feeling so alone in the pain… and being able to put words to confusing experiences is so empowering.

Anddddd… what often happens is that this leads to reading more books, listening to more podcasts, finding more stuff on social media to validate these experiences… and maybe even going to therapy a couple times a month to talk through these findings.

Again, these actions are such an important part of growth… Yet, unfortunately, they do not lead to “change”… they are simply the awareness and information needed to work towards change.

The real healing and growth take place when there is implementation of this information… and we make intentional efforts towards choosing new behaviors. Using self-discipline to stop doing the things that are hurtful to others, focusing on our own areas of growth, instead of focusing on what others are doing wrong… and allowing ourselves to be a bit (or extremely) uncomfortable, as we adjust to new and healthier behaviors.

As a reminder, Relationship (Re)Programming consists of 3 steps:

  • Awareness (of how you were programmed and how this is impacting you present-day).

  • Implementation (identifying what needs to change AND actually practicing these changes).

  • Adaptation (allowing yourself the time, space, and grace to get used to these new behaviors).

It’s a hard truth… but just reading, listening, and talking about your “healing journey” is not enough for change…

If your genuine desire is growth… You have to be willing to do the hard things to make this happen.

Dr. Liz’s Book Release

Relatable | Relationships Unfiltered Episode 33

Dr. Liz hangs out with Mathew Blades, host of the Learn From People Who Lived It podcast, for part two of this special four-part series all about intimacy. In this second episode, Dr. Liz and Mathew discuss Relationship Programming, including what it is, where it comes from, and the influence that it has on intimacy. They explore the impact of our upbringings on how we show up in intimate relationships and they each get vulnerable about experiences in their own upbringings. Dr. Liz and Mathew provide insights about ways to “reprogram” and explain why this is so important for our intimate relationships.