Intimacy Requires Intentionality

Elizabeth Fedrick
July 10, 2024

Tips from Dr. Liz

One of the most important things to keep in mind about intimacy… is that it is something we are constantly building and fostering through daily & intentional efforts.

Intimacy with our partners is not a destination we arrive at, but rather, it requires daily awareness, intentions, and efforts towards creating and nurturing this very special connection.

Intimacy requires…

Intentional efforts towards creating emotional & physical safety.
Consistency & mutuality in showing up for each other.
Allowing for each partner to have unique wants & needs.
The willingness to talk about uncomfortable & difficult things.
Being aware of (and gentle with) each other’s insecurities.
Scheduling weekly check-ins to talk about your relationship.
Managing your expectations (perfection should not be the goal).
Asking questions about your partner’s feelings & experiences.
Scheduling daily & weekly one-on-one connection rituals.
Addressing conflict as it arises & repairing as soon as possible.
Accepting that intimacy is an ongoing journey with ups & downs.

I continue to provide regular reminders on this topic because I have come to learn through my time with clients working on their relationships, as well as my own experiences, that the daily efforts towards connection and safety are really easy to forget, dismiss, or be “too busy” for.

Thus, many of us look back on the week, and realize that so many of these little (or bigger) behaviors towards creating or protecting our intimacy, with someone we care about, either took place very little or not at all…

I’m here to let you know… that if a healthy and connected relationship is what you desire… we have to stop looking at these intimacy requirements as optional or something that sounds good if we “have time.”

Your partner deserves better than that.

You deserve better than that.

And your relationship as whole, deserves better than that.

Pick one thing (while you’re thinking about it) that you will do today to foster connection & intimacy… and set an alarm if you need to, so that you won’t forget!

Expert Spotlight

Brittany Green graduated from Indiana University with a focus on human and animal behavior. She lives in Berlin, Germany, and works as a mental health and life coach that specializes in sexuality, dating, and relationships.

Fun Facts:

I study, rescue, and rehabilitate domestic animals and wildlife.
I am an author and write children’s and adult books based around life and mental health lessons.
I run a women’s online fashion boutique that focuses on bringing back sophisticated allure and the soft life.

Relatable | Relationships Unfiltered Episode 63

Dr. Liz hangs out with Brittany Green, Certified Intimacy and Relationship Coach, to discuss the vital role communication plays in enhancing intimacy. They explore practical strategies for fostering deeper connection in the bedroom by encouraging open and honest dialogue about both successes and challenges. Brittany highlights the tendency for long-term partners to fall into assumptions rather than actively engaging in meaningful conversation, emphasizing the importance of recognizing and embracing growth and change within each other. Tune in to unlock the keys to improving intimacy through effective communication.